Wonderful people who do nothing spectacular and notable by worldly definitions live their lives and often don't realize what an impact they have made. Instead of telling them each day how special they are and what they mean to us, we wait until they're gone and then we tell everyone else how special they were. This seems backwards, so I've decided to change the order of things with the people I love.
With only a few exceptions, every Wednesday for the past 3.5 years I have packed up my car and driven to Martinsville to visit with my grandma. Ever since I can remember, Grandpa and Grandma were there. I spent my days and several nights with them as a child. They loved me, taught me, trained me, and laughed with me. Because they owned a small country grocery store, I also was able to watch how they interacted with numbers of different people. As I grew older and school became "in town" and life filled up with friends and sports and clubs and all the things teens fill their days with, my time with Grandpa and Grandma slimmed way down. I thought of them often, but believed that they would always be there to catch up with when I was older and life slowed down...heh, the "wisdom" of childish thinking.
Well, my time finally came when Elissa's birth was nearing and I was daydreaming of the time I would have at home with her, without having to return to work. Plans were quickly coming together in my mind, and included as a top priority was to start visiting Grandpa and Grandma each week. It would be a drive, but hey, I wouldn't have a job and they were well worth it. Turned out God had different plans, which He often does. Elissa was born on a snowy February 9 in 2007. On Wednesday February 14, Jason and I packed up our newborn little girl and went to the hospital to see Grandpa. We got a quick hello in and flashed Elissa before his eyes, and then he started having a bad coughing spell and I left the room in tears to try to keep him from seeing my sadness. Trying to balance the joy of a new daughter with the rapid loss of a beloved grandfather felt all wrong. Why now? Why when I was just going to get to reconnect with him? Why didn't he get to really meet Elissa, hold her, love her, tell her all the wonderful things he told me growing up?
As Pastor Mark has since taught, God led me to not focus on the whys and instead to focus on the who. God had a perfect plan for Grandpa. God knew the timing of everything with everyone in our family. God knew that Grandma would be alone and without her constant companion. Somehow I had to trust that God was in control and his perfect plan for our lives was much, much better than what I could have planned. As much as that hurt to admit at the time.
Quickly, my resolve to spend time with Grandma strengthened. My kids will know my grandmother. They will know her compassion, kindness, gentleness...all balanced with her wonderful sense of humor and mischievousness. They will feel her hugs and get her kisses. They will hear her speak of her prayers for them and the goodness of following hard after Jesus. They will laugh with her, learn from her, and ...well, they probably won't be trained by her much! She leaves that to me mostly and just enjoys getting to be the great grandma. :) They will remember eating cinnamon rolls and M&Ms and sneaking sips of Mountain Dew. Most of all, they will know that JoJo loves Jesus, loves them, and pours out love on those around her. And for this, I am forever grateful.
Some bitter-sweet day when God takes Grandma home to be with Him, there will be far fewer regrets in my mind. Again I'll remind myself of the God who has plans far better than mine. I'll pray for strength to support my mom, who will be devastated. And I'm sure there will be too many stories to count of all the great things Grandma has done in the lives of others. And because of Wednesdays with JoJo, my children will have stories of their own.
Thank you, God, for the blessing of a grandmother who means so much to so many. Bless her today. I can't wait to see her one day with all her heavenly treasures. I'm sure You're having to expand the storehouses daily for her. And however it works in Heaven, tell Grandpa I love him and miss him, especially on Wednesdays.
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